Episode # 32: Resilience & Rising Above: The Inspirational Journey of Whitney Jones
Welcome to Living A Vocal Life: A Podcast For Singers!
Welcome to the Living A Vocal Life Podcast, where I interview singers who have succeeded in creating a life in music. You’ll hear from vocalists of all genres, in different stages of their careers, including singers who’ve been on the Billboard charts and those who are teaching the next generation. What do they have in common? They're all performers with amazing stories to tell and experiences to share.
In our conversations, you’ll learn what inspired them to become a singer, the kinds of challenges they’ve encountered, and how they've overcome them. I'll also share what I've learned on my own journey as a singer and educator — practical tools and insights that will help you to live your best, most authentic vocal life.
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In this episode, you’ll hear the voice of Whitney Jones, a remarkable musician, songwriter, and singer. You may recall her from an earlier episode all about Motherhood & Creativity. If you missed that series, you’ll want to take a listen. Whitney and the other ten women I interviewed shared some insights about the challenges and joys of combining a music career with children. But Whitney’s story of determination and resilience deserves an entire episode.
Her journey began with singing full-on gospel call and response with her mother during bath time. Her passion for music and songwriting began when she could barely reach the piano keys. From an early age, she honed her skills and found comfort in playing the piano and creating her own compositions. It wasn’t long before she knew she wanted to pursue a music career. She nurtured this dream by setting a goal — to attend the prestigious Berklee School of Music in Boston.
However, Whitney faced some challenges. She became pregnant at the age of 16 while still in high school. As a young mother, she confronted adversity and uncertainty. At one point, she even considered giving up on her dream of attending Berklee.
But, driven by her determination and supported by her family, she persevered. Whitney worked tirelessly, taking on multiple jobs and selling chicken dinners to fund her education.
In our conversation, you’ll hear about her experiences with stage fright and imposter syndrome, and how her personal journey and traumas have influenced her musical expression. We talk about her time at Berklee and the hard-earned lessons she learned there, her years as a music therapist, and you’ll hear some of the music she’s making today while raising a blended family of five children.
Whitney Jones — living a vocal life that is a testament to the power of resilience, talent, and an unwavering passion for music.
“I think that it’s important to find your voice, find who you are, and have a why. What is your why? Why do you wanna sing? And really be honest with yourself with that. For me, it is to serve. This is the way I serve humanity by uplifting, inspiring, and empowering people. That’s my why.”
Links:
You can find Whitney on her website, YouTube, or Instagram.
The songs from today’s episode are HIGHER and FEELING SO GOOD and are from Whitney’s album, HIGHER (used with permission.) To listen or download, go HERE.
For more information about Music Therapy, its applications, and music therapy resources, go HERE.
Based On Reality
Whitney has a new album coming out in May of 2024! To find out more and pre-order, head to her website HERE.
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Theme music for the Podcast was composed by John Smith. (Thanks, honey!)
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Whitney: I think that it's important to find your voice, find who you are and have a why. What is your why? Why do you wanna sing? And really be honest with yourself with that. For some people it's because they just want vain praise, and that's, it's okay, but tap into that reason why. Like I said, for me it is to serve. This is the way I serve humanity by uplifting, inspiring, and empowering people. That's my why.
Valerie: Hi, I'm Valerie Day, a singer, educator, and creative explorer. You might know me from my work with the Grammy nominated band Nu Shooz. Welcome to Living a Vocal Life, where I interview singers who have succeeded in creating a life in music. You'll hear from vocalists of all genres in different stages of their careers, including singers who've been on the Billboard charts and those who are teaching the next generation.
What do they have in common? They're all performers with amazing stories to tell and experiences to share. In our conversations, you'll learn what inspired them to become a singer, the kinds of challenges they've encountered, and how they've overcome them. I'll also share what I've learned on my own journey as a singer and educator.
Practical tools and insights that will help you to live your best, most authentic vocal life.
In this episode, you'll hear the voice of Whitney Jones, a remarkable musician, songwriter, and singer. You may recall her from an earlier episode all about motherhood and creativity.
If you missed that series, you'll want to take a listen. Whitney, and the other ten women I interviewed, shared some insights about the challenges and joys of combining a music career with children. But Whitney's story of determination and resilience deserves an episode all its own.
Her journey began with singing full-on gospel call and response with her mother during bath time. Her passion for music and songwriting began when she could barely reach the piano keys. From an early age, she honed her skills and found comfort in playing the piano and creating her own compositions. It wasn't long before she knew she wanted to pursue a music career. She nurtured this dream by setting a goal, to attend the prestigious Berklee School of Music in Boston.
However, Whitney faced some challenges. She became pregnant at the age of 16 while still in high school. As a young mother, she confronted adversity and uncertainty. At one point, she even considered giving up on her dream of attending Berklee.
But driven by her determination and supported by her family, she persevered. Whitney worked tirelessly, taking on multiple jobs and selling chicken dinners to fund her education.
In this conversation, you'll hear about Whitney's experiences with stage fright and imposter syndrome and how her personal journey and traumas have influenced her musical expression.
We discuss her time at Berklee and the guidance of a special teacher who helped her find her authentic voice. We also touch on Whitney's years as a music therapist and her current music-making endeavors while raising a blended family of five children.
Whitney Jones — living a vocal life that serves as a testament to the power of resilience, talent, and an unwavering passion for music.
Thank you so much, Whitney, for being here today. I really appreciate you taking the time out, especially because I know you have a new little three-month-old baby.
Whitney: Six weeks.
Valerie: Oh my God. Six weeks!
Whitney: Yes.
Valerie: Oh, that's even newer than I thought!
Whitney: Yes.
Valerie: Wow. Well, congratulations. And I wanna ask you more questions about him a little further into the interview. But first, I want to ask you, what's your first memory of singing?
[00:05:12] First Memory of Singing
Whitney: One that is really, really foundational is singing with my mother while she was giving me a bath. And she would do this call and response with a gospel song, and she would sing and ask me to mimic what she sang. And I remember doing that. And I was probably well before kindergarten. So, yeah, that's my first distinctive memory of singing. You know, and, and realizing I loved it. I wanted to sound; I wanted to sound as good as she was.
Valerie: That's a wonderful memory. So was your mother a singer?
Whitney: She's not a singer, but she can sing. Honestly, most of the people in my family can sing. They're, but they're not singers because, um, a lot of my family, uh, they're in the church. So you, you have to sing in church.
Valerie: Yeah. But what great ear training for you to have bath time be a time of call and response.
Whitney: Oh, definitely, definitely. And the song that she sang was not just, Jesus loves me, this I know, you know, it was, a full-fledged gospel song, uh, with intricate parts. I remember that.
Valerie: That's beautiful. How many kids were in your family?
Whitney: Uh, just my brother and I. So two.
Valerie: Are you the oldest or the youngest?
Whitney: It seems like I'm the oldest, but no, I'm the baby. I call myself the little big sister, but no, I, I am the baby. We are 15 months apart, so we're relatively close in age.
Valerie: Yeah. My brother and I are 13 months apart, and my mother will say, yeah, I don't know who was president when you guys were young. You know, I was too busy.
Whitney: I get it. That's how I feel now.
Valerie: I bet you do. The outside world is probably not even a thing at this point. Yeah.
Whitney: I don't know what going on in, in the world. I know what's going on in my world, but not, I don't know what's happening.
Valerie: Well, you started playing the piano at age five and were writing songs by the time you were in fifth grade.
Whitney: Yes.
Valerie: How did that, how did that come about? Was there a piano in your house? Were you playing and taking lessons, or did you just start picking it up by ear?
[00:07:35] Early Piano And Song Writing
Whitney: I actually grew up with a piano in my home, and it's interesting because I remember around three or four climbing up to the piano and just like with on my tiptoes, just twinkling the ivory a little bit. And it was when I was four that my mother realized that I was musically inclined. She said that she was in the kitchen, and I was playing either O Come All Ye Faithful or Joy To The World, one or the other. It was during the holiday season. My birthday's in December, so I was turning five. And I started playing it by ear while she was in the kitchen singing it. And she realized, oh, she's playing it, huh? So she said shortly after that, she got me into private piano lessons. So I studied with Dr. Shirley Blankenship in Champaign, Illinois. And that was my journey. That was the beginning of my journey with piano.
I was inspired to write just because I was a creative child, so I just always enjoyed writing.
Valerie: Well, and you must have had an incredible ear from a young age. Not only was your mother training you when you were in the bathtub, with the call and response, but also to pick out the key that she was singing in and then play along with her when you were four. That's pretty remarkable.
Whitney: Yeah.
Valerie: Yeah. So that's great that she picked up on it and was obviously very supportive of your creativity.
Whitney: Definitely. And, I appreciate that. I'm, I'm always forever grateful for her encouraging me to begin my journey with music. She said when I was a baby, I would pretty much only play with the loud toys or the music toys. So I just kind of came into the world like, all right, music's my thing.
Yep.
That's what I came here for. Show me what you got.
Valerie: I love it. I love it.
So did you know other people who wrote songs, or was this just something that, I mean, how did you come upon this idea? Like, I'm gonna write songs now.
Whitney: I just did it innocently as a child, like just making songs up. I was a straight-A student in school, and that's how I would remember things. I would make songs up, you know, like periodic table or multiplication or pemdas or whatever, you know, in math, just I would make little songs up to remember what I needed to for the tests. And it was just something I did. It was just second nature.
I wanna say I had an older cousin who was very musical. He was my mom's first cousin, so his name is Bobo. Bobo played all the instruments, and we would go over to Bobo's house, and he would have guitars and bongos and congas and the keyboard and horns and just all kinds of instruments, and he could play all of them.
And he would be like, Whitney, get on the piano and have my brother on the drums. And we'd be making stuff up and singing and harmonies, and it was just fun. That's something we did as, as children, just singing with family. I'm not sure if he wrote songs, but he would always encourage my musicality.
Valerie: That's so important to have somebody like that, that you can look at and go, well, he plays all those instruments. I could do that. And then to have that opportunity to play together like that too, and just make stuff up.
Whitney: We'd just make songs up on the spot. Just, just anything. And then we'd add harmonies. It was just, it was like a family band. It was just for fun, though, you know? But I was, like, really taking it seriously. I was like, no, this is serious.
Valerie: Because at that point, did you know that you wanted to make this a profession? Did you know that you wanted to have it be your career?
Whitney: I did. I don't remember ever wanting to do anything else. I think at times I would say, oh, well, I'll be a writer, but I still gotta do something with music, you know? Or I'll be, I'll go into psychology, which we'll talk about that a little later. But music was always there. But I just, I can't see myself doing anything else. And as a child, this is just what I wanted to do.
I found a paper from when I was in fourth grade; we had to write out goals. And on that paper, I wrote, when I grow up, I wanna be a singer. I wrote pianoist cuz I didn't wanna write pianist. And I said a wife and a mother and an actress.
Valerie: Wow.
Whitney: Fourth grade.
Valerie: Fourth grade, the power of intention. Right there. Right there. Yeah. So when did you start performing?
Whitney: Gosh, I wanna say all my life because, again, I grew up in the church, so we had to be in front of people all the time in choir and different things like that. And then, being formally trained on piano, we had recitals all the time. So I've been performing since four or five, you know, as early as I can remember.
And in elementary school, I would also do talent shows and different events in the community where I played the piano. So,
[00:12:56] Stage Fright & Switching From Piano To Voice As A Focus
Valerie: So, you got a lot of practice when you were young, singing and playing music in front of people. Did you ever feel shy about it or have stage fright?
Whitney: Oh yeah. So let me say this. I hid behind the piano until about eighth grade. I would sing in groups or in choir. I even did show choir, honors choir. I would do that. But to have a solo? It wasn't until eighth grade when I was like, all right, I'm gonna do this talent show, and I'm not gonna play the piano this time. I'm gonna sing. And I got a standing ovation, and people were coming up to my mom afterward, and they were like, we didn't know she could sing. Oh my gosh, she's so good. And she was like, I didn't either. I didn't know she could sing like that.
So that was my coming out with my voice, so to speak. Eighth-grade talent show. And after that, I switched my focus from piano to voice and started doing more performances where I was singing or singing and playing the piano.
Valerie: That's fantastic. Yeah. But how wonderful that you had that piano background to begin with. I think that's a really helpful thing, to be able to play and sing at the same time for yourself.
Whitney: I agree. It definitely has sharpened my ear, and I understand how to use my voice as an instrument. When I'm performing with a band, I'm listening to mostly the keys and the bass, and listening to what's happening, even when I'm doing improv, and that way I can kind of bounce off of them.
So it's given me, um, definitely a strong point as a musician.
Valerie: Yeah, cuz you are a musician. I think singers need to think of themselves, not just, and I don't wanna say just singers cuz that's, that's not it either, you know? Yeah. But, but if you really wanna be able to communicate..
Whitney: Mm-hmm.
Valerie: ...speaking the language is imperative, and so knowing an instrument just helps you to speak the language so that you can communicate your ideas. And sounds like that was a thing that you were able to do really well.
[00:15:13] Pregnant At Age 16
Valerie: So you were 16 then when you became pregnant. And I read that all you'd wanted since seventh grade was to go to Berkeley College of Music in Boston.
And so I'm just wondering why did you decide, okay, well, I'm gonna become a mom now instead of later.
Whitney: Well, honestly, uh, it's a result of trauma. You know, I, I really believe that when, if a teenager ends up pregnant, then something's happened along the way. And that's essentially what happened. Um, just to be transparent, I was molested as a child and I was grieving going through a lot of grief process after my cousin who was like my brother died. We relocated from Illinois to Georgia. It was just a huge shift. Everything was different on top of grief, like. And I was just kinda lashing out, so to speak. And boom, I ended up pregnant. And I remember not knowing what my future would look like at that point. It wasn't like I planned it, you know?
I I couldn't see past my circumstance and I honestly wanted to die. I, I had thoughts of suicide. I, I feel like I was just in survival mode. And I remember crying a lot and my stepmom was in town, and, um, I said, oh, I made my family a statistic. I don't wanna be a statistic. Oh, oh. You know, like, woe is me. This happened and blah, blah, blah. I don't wanna be a statistic.
And she looked at me and she said, well, don't. It was like a light bulb went off and it was like, what? You can still do everything that you said you wanted to do. You just have a baby. It's gonna be hard, but you can do it. Oh, okay.
So that was a turning point for me because I definitely was depressed. I'll say that. Um, I was, I was going through depression and, um, that light bulb went off and it basically lit a fire under me. You know, it, it lit a fire under me. I was like, okay. Here we go. I'm gonna do everything that I set out to do. You know, I'm, I'm gonna beat the odds. I had so many people doubting me at that point.
Even I used to play basketball. I remember my coach when she found out I was pregnant, you know, your coach is like, uh, that's like somebody you really look up to. And instead of her saying like, it'll be okay, you'll get through it. Her response to me was, you messed your life up.
I was like, okay. I had friends of the family who were adults and, you know, I could hear them talking bad about me to my mom or my aunt or whatever, and it wasn't like I was just being promiscuous. It's something that happened and, um, I wanted to prove all them wrong.
Valerie: Mm-hmm.
Whitney: I wanted to show them that I can do what I said I was gonna do, which is make it. And the first thing I needed to do was graduate from high school. So I had my son, my junior year of high school. Everyone was getting ready for back to school. I was getting ready for a baby my junior year, August of 2003.
I was in Georgia at the time. And so they have a program, you know, if a student is hospitalized or anything, you know, medical, which that was considered medical obviously, um, they would provide like a tutor, like a in-home tutor since you can't come to the physical high school.
So my tutor would show up and sit and have coffee and cake with my mom because my homework would be finished. And she never had to do anything cuz I would just get my assignments, read what I needed to read, study what I needed to study, do my work, projects, essays, whatever.
I came back to school and my grades were like 98, 99, 100. Across the board.
Valerie: You were determined. You were already good at school, but this was like, Nope, I'm not gonna be a statistic. And that one sentence, you don't have to be, changed your attitude, it sounds like.
Whitney: Yeah, definitely. It gave me that fire. And I graduated high school with honors.
[00:19:42] Berkley School of Music
Whitney: You know, it was, it was nice to, do that. And, and then it was like, all right, here's Berkeley. I got accepted and I didn't know how I was gonna make it, but..
Valerie: Wait a minute, wait a minute. So, yeah, so did you go audition or did you send a video? How did you get accepted to Berkeley?
Whitney: So, at the time you didn't have to audition. I did send in a tape or CD rather for one of the uh, scholarship opportunities. But you had to have your recommendation letters, your references. They wanted to know all about your music history and everything. And I applied junior year. I was like, I know where I'm going.
Valerie: Might as well apply now.
Whitney: Yeah. So by the time senior year rode around, people were running around trying to take SATs and this and that, and I was like, I'm all good. I, I know where I'm going. I did also apply to Georgia State University and I ended up going there my freshman year of college because of finances.
But while I was at Georgia State, I was like, I'm going to Berkeley. I'm going, I didn't know how, I didn't know, I didn't know how this was gonna work. I just kept saying, I'm gonna go to Berkeley, I'm gonna Berkeley, I'm going to Berkeley, I'm moving to Boston to go to Berkeley. And people were like, oh, okay, cool. I just kept saying it and sure enough...
Valerie: It happened.
Whitney: It happened. Yeah.
Valerie: And part of the reason it happened is because.. Well, your family was hugely supportive as well. While you were in school was your mom taking care of your little one?
So you were accepted into Berkeley, but then how did you earn enough money to go?
Whitney: Oh, we sold chicken dinners.
Valerie: Right on.
Whitney: We sold chicken dinners. I also worked, I was an assistant manager at Subway. I also worked at the bank. I had enough credits to leave school my senior year around like noon, so around lunchtime. I could work two jobs. I, I worked a lot, I worked hard. I worked at the bank, and then after that I would get off, change clothes and go to Subway, come home 11 o'clock at night, nurse my baby overnight and take care of him overnight.
I don't know when and how I did homework.
Valerie: I don't either. Or sleep!
Whitney: Oh, sleep was not a thing. I was a zombie.
Valerie: You were sleep walking through a lot of this other stuff. So your mom would take care of what's your little boy, your, first born's name?
Whitney: Robert.
Valerie: Robert. So your, your mom would take care of Robert during the day. You wouldn't need to go to school. You'd go to work, come home, take care of him all night, wake up, do the whole thing all over again. And when did you make the chicken dinners?
Whitney: We would do that on the weekends. She would cook and I would go and deliver them, and it was just a way to raise money. So that was one way. And you know, just saving money. Um, I also got a scholarship when I was at Georgia State, so I got a refund from that because I had so many grants and scholarships to cover the tuition and my books and everything. So I actually got some money back and that was helpful.
So me not being able to go my first year benefited me. But, you know, going to Georgia State, it was a blessing in disguise.
Valerie: Sometimes, people think, oh, well I didn't make it, I didn't make this hurdle that I wanted to make. I didn't make this goal that I wanted to make. But sometimes you need more time, you know?
So then, when you were 19, you moved with your three-year-old.
Whitney: Yeah. From Georgia to Massachusetts.
Valerie: That's a big leap, and there were no friends or family there. What was that like?
Whitney: I think at the time I didn't realize how big of a deal it was. Uh, now looking back on it, I'm like, wow, that was cool. Like I did that. Uh, I drove myself up from Atlanta to Boston, 26 hour drive.
Valerie: With a three-year-old.
Whitney: With three-year-old, my boyfriend at the time. Quickly became an ex, but he only drove eight of those hours out of 26.
So I was..
Valerie: The writing was on the wall with that.
Whitney: Oh yeah. It ended after that. But he didn't want me to go anyway. But, um, I, I got there and I was like, all right, this is it. I just, it was like I just put my head down and took one step in front of the other, like one foot in front of the other, you know what I mean? I didn't think about, oh, this is hard or challenging.
I, I didn't have time to focus on the feeling. I was afraid. I was excited though, but I, I knew this was what I wanted and I figured, well, everybody else is going to college who's my age and doing what they wanna do. Why can't I? That became my like, okay, that person's doing it. There's no difference between me and that person other than I have a baby, but okay, I can do it.
Valerie: What I read is that you got there. You went into the business office and you said, all right, I'm here. Help me make it through. What are you gonna do to help me stay here and make this work?
Whitney: The financial aid office, yes. I kind of like, um, just sat in there. I just kind of camped out. I was like, all right, you know, I did not have tuition paid for that semester. You know, I had enough money to move and cover some expenses, but my tuition wasn't fully paid. And so I arrived cuz you can't register for classes until you're financially cleared.
So I had to go straight to the financial aid office and I was like, I did not drive all the way up here for nothing. I will sit here until y'all figure something out, but I'm here and I came here and I will be graduating. And they were like, okay. So..
Valerie: This woman's determined. We better help her or she'll be here in the office forever!
Whitney: Uh, will sit here. I had snacks for my son and we sat there on the floor. And they said, okay, you gotta talk to the director of Bursar. So I was sitting in the hallway waiting for her. They said she'll be back in like three hours. Okay. So I just sat in the hallway on the floor and this lady comes up eventually and I don't think it was three hours, but she came up eventually and she sees my son and she's playing with him like, oh, he's so cute. He's, you know, three year old. And, uh, she was like, um, what are, may I help you cuz you're just sitting out here? I said, oh yes, I'm, I'm waiting for Sabrina Harlan. And she was like, oh, that's me. So she brought me into the office, we chatted, I explained to her my situation . She took me back to financial aid. They had to talk to the director. They sent me upstairs to talk to the vice president at the time. And they worked some things out financially and I was able to attend.
Valerie: Amazing.
Whitney: Yeah.
Valerie: Talk about perseverance.
You. Yeah.
Yeah.
[00:26:55] Most Impactful Moments From Her Time At Berkley
Valerie: When you look back on your years at Berkeley, what were the most impactful moments for you as an artist, as a musician? What did you learn musically that you might never have known had you not gone there? Was it worth it, I guess is what I'm saying? After all the chicken dinners and all the, all the, I'm gonna go and all the camping out in the business office.
Whitney: the financial aid office.
Valerie: Yeah.
Whitney: Um, it was worth it for me. It was, uh, I believe Berkeley was an excellent program because I felt like I was a diamond in the rough, and it just kind of like sharpened me and, okay, now you're all bright and pretty. Go on. That's kind of what it did.
Um, I was always Whitney Jones before Berkeley. I was always who I am. You know, I, I I never say like a school or somebody made me, it just sharpened me. And they gave me tools so I can stand firmly and solid as a musician. You know, how we were talking in the beginning about being a singer, you know, um, what that means. And understanding that your voice is an instrument.
One of the huge parts of attending Berkeley for me was when I found my voice. I had to find my voice.
Valerie: And what do you mean by find your voice?
Whitney: I was very insecure when I first got to Berkeley because it's the best of the best. Everybody's great and I was used to being great and it was only like a couple people around that were great. But then you look around and everybody's a beast. You're like, oh, you're really good. Oh, okay. So it kind of makes you like, oh, I dealt with imposter syndrome.
[00:28:48] Finding Her Voice
Whitney: Do do I need to be here? Are they sure they wanted me? Was this a mistake? Let me just kind of hide under the radar and you know, sing a little bit so that way they don't find out that I'm not supposed to be here. You know, no one will know. It's just imposter syndrome. And one of my vocal teachers, Gabrielle Goodman, she was one of Chaka Khan's background vocalists for years, she helped me find my voice. And it was just simply by her being loving and patient. Like, Whitney, I know you got it in you girl. Let it out. I know you got it in you. Like that's how she would talk to me, and I'd be like, okay. She'd be like, come on, give it to me.
Valerie: I love that. This is what good voice teachers do. They make a safe space for you. Besides all the other things that you need to know about the voice being your instrument, of course, and you know how to do the breathing and all that, that all doesn't matter if you're afraid to really sing from who you know, that place that we all know we can, but oh, maybe I better not.
Whitney: Yeah. And so I have videos of my progression. One day I'm gonna share this online. From my first recital at Berkeley to my senior recital at Berkeley. What a difference.
Wow.
Valerie: That's great that you have those.
Whitney: Yeah.
Valerie: A snapshot.
Whitney: Mm-hmm.
Valerie: It sounds like that was the most impactful thing you learned not just as a musician but as a person.
Whitney: Oh, yeah. Before we return to my conversation with Whitney. I want to take a moment to express my gratitude for your support and listenership. I truly appreciate each and every one of you.
Valerie: The connections I've formed with both you and the guests I interview on the podcast are what motivates me to continue creating content year after year. In fact, I long for more of these connections. Which is why I have a special request for you. I'm excited to introduce a new platform called pod inbox, designed to enhance our connection. It's a place where you can interact with me and fellow listeners. In the Ask Me Anything section you can leave an audio or text message. If your question or comment is valuable to other singers, I may include it in a future podcast episode with your permission of course. So let's connect. Simply visit podcastinbox.com/livingavocallife. That's podcastinbox.com/livingavocallife. While you're there you also have the option to make a small donation to support the continued success of the podcast. Thank you in advance for your questions comments or contributions i can't wait to hear from you.
Now let's return to my conversation with Whitney.
[00:33:00] Music Therapy[00:33:00] Musical Influences
Valerie: You graduated with a bachelor's degree in music with a concentration in music therapy. Were you planning on becoming a music therapist at some point? Where does the psychology fit into this picture?
Whitney: Okay. So I remember when we had to choose majors I knew I was coming to Berkeley to do contemporary writing and production, which is what I'm doing now. But there was this other table, music therapy. And I was like, what is this about? Hmm. So I went over to that little info session and got the information and blown away.
It merges psychology and music together. And I was like, this, this is possible? This is a real thing? You can help people and do music?
What?
Valerie: That's awesome.
Whitney: So I was a board certified music therapist for five years. I worked in hospitals doing music therapy. I'm still, I still consider myself a music therapist. I just don't have the certification anymore. However, one of the things that I really appreciated about music therapy you learn how to give in this way that can help people heal. The focus is not, Hey, look at me, I'm a musician, I'm performing for you. Admire me. The focus is I'm gonna give you something to help you heal. And that resonates with me because music is my gift. I wanna give it to people. I want people to be uplifted, inspired, and empowered.
It's written all of this on my mirror to be uplifted, inspired and empowered kick fear out of their face and walk in love.
And I wanna be able to help people do that through music. So when I worked in mental health, I worked in the hospitals with people who had depression or bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, substance abuse, dual diagnoses.
I've also worked with children with pervasive developmental disabilities such as autism, Asperger's, and other developmental disabilities. I've also worked with the elderly in the skilled nursing facilities.
I've worked on the children's oncology unit at Mass. General Hospital helping children who were, you know, perhaps facing death or dealing with terminal illnesses. That was the hardest practicum for me as a mom, cuz they were about the same age as my son. And it was hard seeing children like that.
Valerie: Yeah.
Whitney: But they didn't care when the music lady came in with all her instruments and they're like, yeah, I'm ready to jam.
Valerie: They're in the moment, back in the moment again.
Whitney: We, we all were, you know. music really makes you focus on the now.
Valerie: Mm-hmm.
Whitney: Don't worry about a thing cuz every little thing's gonna be all right. You know, like Bob Marley said.
[00:36:28] After Berkley: Teaching & Music Therapy Internship
Valerie: Yep. In this moment. Right on. So what happened next after you graduated and you, spent five years doing music therapy and then what?
Whitney: Well, I did my internship first and then I didn't start doing music therapy right away. I started a business going to one of the private Christian schools in the inner city.
Valerie: In Boston?
Whitney: Yes, in Boston. I would teach piano and voice and I also developed an afterschool program for them cuz they didn't have one at all. They didn't have music.
Then they offered me a position and I stayed there for a few months and I was like, okay, I can't do the music teaching position full-time every day. This is a bit much. Cuz I was also performing and gigging on the weekends and rehearsals and it was just a lot. On top of still doing the afterschool program.
And so I, I had that business going. I also was teaching piano and voice in Needham, which is a suburb of Boston. And the main thing was I had a residency at Wally's Jazz Cafe, which is a historic jazz venue in Boston. I was the first female vocalist to ever have her own night to lead a band. So I made history doing that.
I did that for about a year or so. Um, then I relocated to Phoenix in 2012 and started my journey here and that's when I got serious about, okay, I can do the music therapy and I'll tell you why I paused on music therapy. I was afraid to take the test to get my certification, imposter syndrome again.
Valerie: Wow. After all that you, uh, isn't it wild? After all that you achieved and, and to have imposter syndrome raise its ugly head again? I get you though. I have bad imposter syndrome sometimes. And I think I've got it under control. I think I've made friends with it, you know, and then there's an opportunity and I show up for it. And oh my God, there it is again.
And I just, it's incredible how it takes over your body,
Whitney: Mm-hmm.
Valerie: your mind, your emotions. I taught at Portland State University in Portland for a little while. And I never graduated from college. I only had two years. So I was going to, I was gonna teach, I'd been asked to teach. Good friend of mine worked there, wanted me to be a part of the department. The jazz vocal department.
Whitney: Yeah.
Valerie: Went in to get my badge, you know, that says my name and that I'm official. I had a almost a panic attack.
Whitney: wow..
Valerie: Looking around at people and thinking, oh my God, they know, they know. I don't know what the hell I'm doing here. What?
And I mean, I just, it was so incredibly powerful. And I'm still, I'm not exactly sure where that comes from, but I think a lot of people experience that. So what do you do when you have that kind of, when you have that kind of, uh, feeling now? Does it come up for you now?
[00:39:40] Facing Fear
Whitney: Yeah. I, I really believe it's just fear, it's just anxiety. And what I've learned is whenever you feel fear, do it, do the thing that you're afraid of. Because on the other side of that fear bubble is what you want.
Valerie: Mm-hmm.
Whitney: You know, it's like, just pop that bubble and get through that. Because on that other side, that, that's where your goal is, that's where that dream is. Or, or that relationship or that, that job or that position, whatever it is, you know. When I feel anxious now I allow myself to feel it. I don't deny it. I'm like, okay, I'm feeling anxious. Why do I feel that? What am I afraid of? And I have to like kind of talk myself through it. Like, you're worthy. You got this, you know, you know what to do.
You know, you're skilled. You are just as great as everyone else. You know, you just kind of have to tell yourself that. And like, you're love and what you wanna give to the world is love. So that's not a bad thing. Go do it.
Valerie: That's a good voice to listen to.
Whitney: It just helps me center myself, and get grounded.
[00:40:56] Self-care & Meditation
Whitney: I also meditate now, so that's very helpful.
Valerie: That particular, uh, mini panic attack was before I started meditating and it's been about 12 years now since I started, and it's been a good thing. So what does it do for you? How does it help you in, in your life as a musician and a mom?
Whitney: Yeah. Meditation is, very, very crucial to my mental health, my spiritual health, my emotional health. It is my me time. It is the time that I get to just go and focus on myself. And I don't like to say clear my mind, but, you know, just focus on something. Think about what I'm thinking about, because that's essentially what I'm doing when I meditate.
I'm like watching all these thoughts. I like to think of 'em as like clouds. Oh, that's a thought. That's a thought. You know, and just kind of watch em go by. All right? That is what that is. It also helps me, again, just stay grounded. I feel like when I meditate, I am more in tune, which makes music easier for me to funnel, so to speak.
I am a vessel, I hear music, I just hear it, and then I like, okay, let me go sit at the piano and write, or the guitar, or let me make a voice memo on my phone. It makes the channels clearer, so to speak. And as a mom, it helps me to become, uh, more present.
Valerie:
[00:42:28] Motherhood & A Blended Family
Valerie: So, let's get back to motherhood a little bit. Speaking of meditation and being present for your children. First of all, you've had two more children since you had Robert years ago.
Whitney: I have a two-year-old and a six-week-old now. My husband and I, we have a blended family. So we have Robert, who's the 19 year old, and then we have two others and they're 14, 12. And then our toddler, our two year old, and then the six week old. That's the age range, 19 to six weeks.
Valerie: So how do you get your creative work done now?
Whitney: Honestly, it's the same as before. I, I have to wait until I'm inspired and when I'm inspired, everybody in the house knows I hear nothing. The food will burn. I don't know what's going on. Our other children, they call me Mama Whit, they're like, Mama Whit, Mama Whit. And I'm just like, huh, huh. Oh, okay. Yeah.
Valerie: You just tune it all out and focus.
Whitney: I tune everybody out. I tune 'em out. The only person I can't tune out right now is the six week old. Obviously, you know, I'm also nursing. I think breastfeeding is amazing, uh, for the mother and for the baby. So I don't turn, I don't tune him out or the toddler, but you know, for the most part, everyone else is like, I cannot hear what you're saying. I don't know what's going on. I am writing.
I do a lot of writing when people are asleep.
Valerie: Yeah.
Whitney: Yeah.
Valerie: So do you sacrifice your own sleep sometimes for the, for the muse?
Whitney: Oh, oh, yeah. Yeah. But it doesn't feel like it. I'm not really tired when I'm doing music. I can do it for hours. I even remember when I was pregnant, like I was in the studio and I just, I didn't eat. I was just doing music. I'm in the studio working, doing what I gotta do. And I was like, oh, it's two o'clock already. Huh. You know, it had been hours and I was pregnant. Usually, I was like, oh, I gotta eat. I'm hungry.
I need something to eat.
Valerie: I'm making a baby in here!
Whitney: I'm making a baby feed me.
Valerie: Yeah.
Whitney: I can go without food and water when I'm working on music and sleep. it energizes me.
Valerie: Well that's a good thing. Do you feel though, like it's harder to go deep into the creative process when there's all this other stuff going on?
Whitney: Now I would say that. There, there are challenges where, you know, there may be a time limit or I have to tend to something as a mom or a wife or just within our household, so I have to stop. Which always makes me a little sad. But you know, ideally it'd be nice to, you know, just sit for 12 hours and just work on music uninterrupted, you know? But that hasn't been the case for me.
So I, it's kind of like, okay, the baby sleep. All right. The toddlers sleep. All right. Everybody else is at school, husband's at work. Oh, okay. Woo-hoo. Gonna work on this. You know what I mean? I'm like writing really quickly or doing something.
Sometimes it's in the car. I have a lot of voice memos cuz I listen to my music on repeat and I'm like hearing, okay, what else am I hearing with this part? What am I doing? Oh. And so I'm driving, picking kids up and I'm like, recording voice memos. You guys be quiet. I gotta record this idea. You know? And they know, they know.
So..
Valerie: They're respectful of, of your time and your creativity. Have, you, talked to them about that?
Whitney: So Robert obviously grew up with me in music, right. And the other two, I've known them for four years now. So they've seen what I do and they've come to performances and concerts. They see me at the piano writing or recording videos or this or that, you know, so they know.
One of my sons, he said, mama Whit, when you gonna make some new music? I'm tired of hearing this song.
Valerie: Ah, from the mouths of tweens..
Whitney: Yeah.
Valerie: ..Or teens.
Whitney: Yeah. He is 12, so I was like, and he said that when he was 10, so I was like, uh, okay, fine. I'll make something. And so I've been working on my album actually for the past couple of years. So now I'm like, see, I have new music.
Valerie: So I think you've kind of told us about your patterns, like your schedule and how that relates to your physical and emotional life, but maybe you have more to say about that.
Whitney: Yeah. Um, I would say this as a mom, regardless of what field you're in, you have to self care. Again, that's meditation or gratitude journal, or doing my passion, which is music. Going out in nature, those things are important for me. Eating, you know, sometimes it's, I need to eat today.
You know, sometimes it is just taking that time for yourself to eat, to, to self-care, to love on yourself. I'm learning that, um, I have to mother myself just as much as I have to mother my children. So like, I'll feed them and everything and I'm washing and cleaning and doing what I gotta do, and I look up and it's two o'clock in the afternoon and I haven't eaten, and I'm like, oh no, Whitney, you have to take care of yourself.
And when I've taken care of myself, everything else flows better. I can be more attentive as a mom, a wife, a musician. I'm not so stressed out, you know? So I would say that's the number one thing to help connect everything is self-care, self-love. Hands down.
Valerie: Beautiful. How do you treat yourself when you can't get to your work? What kind of thoughts do you have when you're really frustrated by the fact that this creative thing is just right there and you can't get to it?
Whitney: That's kinda how I feel about my album right now.
But I know I'm just six weeks postpartum, so, uh, in time. But when I can't accomplish my goals I get frustrated. I do, uh, I I can be a little short and snappy sometimes if I'm not able to do the thing that I love. I also can tell when I'm unable to do the thing that I love for so long, it takes a toll on my mental health.
I'll start feeling anxious or depressed or.. And then I can get to a point where I just don't wanna do it at all. And I always can tell when I dip into depression, because I won't touch the piano. I won't sing. I don't wanna hear music. I just kind of like block it out. And it's not always easy, but when things are flowing, I have to stay in that vibration and make sure I can stay afloat.
[00:49:28] Selfcare & Therapy
Valerie: So it's medicine for you.
Whitney: Oh, yeah.
Valerie: If you notice yourself going into a darker place, how do you pull music back in? What's the trigger that gets you back into that flow?
Whitney: First of all, admitting that I'm in the dark place.
Like I have to really like look at it and understand what's going on. I'm also in therapy. I love therapy. Every therapist needs a therapist. Every person should experience therapy at some point in their life.
Valerie: Good for, yes. Agreed. So helpful to have these wise people to help us figure ourselves out and you know, more tools. More tools for living.
Whitney: More tools. Yeah.
Yeah.
So I would say again, that self-care is crucial because it helps bring me out of that, and it helps me to be able to tap back into music.
Valerie: Mm-hmm.
Whitney: When I meditate, when I write in my gratitude journal, when I've gone to therapy or I've sat in the sun. Sometimes it's just getting out, getting some vitamin D, you know, sitting in the sun. Especially, um, after just having a baby, you know, I'm in the house a lot and I can tell when it's day two or three, and I've been in the house and I'm like, all right, I gotta get out of this house. Even if it's just the backyard. I need sun. Sunlight is crucial.
Valerie: Nature. Crucial.
Yep.
[00:50:51] What's Next
Valerie: So what is next for you? I You have this six week old. You've got a record that you've been working on for a couple years now. I'm sure you wanna get back to that, but like you said, all in good time. It's not quite time yet, but, but then what?
Whitney: Yeah. So I am finishing that. Right before I went into labor, I sent my keyboardist some tracks. So he sent that during this process. So that was cool to wake up one day and find that email, and I'm like, yes, I'm still making progress even though I'm laying in the bed postpartum, you know, nursing a baby.
Valerie: Yay.
Whitney: But that was cool to get those tracks. So I'm still making steps forward, finishing this album. The album is, is entitled Based on Reality. In 2020 when the pandemic, you know, when the world shut down, I was pregnant at the time and hormonal and sank into a depression. I couldn't sing. All of my gigs that I had on my calendar just, phoop!
Valerie: Gone.
Whitney: And I had just left my, uh, full-time position six months prior.
Valerie: Oh wow.
Whitney: As a music therapist. So I was like, okay, what is this? Like I, I left my full-time work and I'm like, oh, I'm gonna gig and perform and do my thing. And then this pandemic happened. So I actually had to write my way out of that hole, that dark hole. So the songs that you'll hear on this album are from that time.
I posted a lot of the demos or raw videos on my Instagram page. So you'll see some of those. Some of the titles are Breathe, that's one title. Wake Up and Dream. Hero. And, and that song I love cuz it's just saying, when you need a hero, the hero's inside of you. Be your own hero, you know.
And then there are some love songs and all of that, which I said I was never going to write! Then I fell in love with my husband, so. I'm like, I'm gonna be songwriter who writes about other things. There's too many love songs.
Valerie: I'm with there too. That's so funny. But yet love is still, love is still everything, isn't it?
Whitney: Oh, it is. A beautiful thing.
[00:53:06] Advice For Young Singers: Plug Into Your Why
Valerie: So is there any advice that you would give young singers who are trying to create a life in music now?
Whitney: Mm-hmm. Yes. Well, especially being an independent artist. I think that it's important to find your voice, find who you are and have a why. What is your why? Why do you wanna sing? And really be honest with yourself with that. For some people it's because they just want vain praise, and that's, it's okay, but tap into that reason why. Like I said, for me it is to serve. This is the way I serve humanity by uplifting, inspiring, and empowering people. That's my why.
Valerie: It does help because music is not an easy thing. Not an easy business to be in, and when you plug into your why, especially during the times when you're wondering, why the hell did I do, did I do this? And I think most people who end up making it are the people who can't imagine doing anything else, you know?
And so it sounds like your why is pretty strong there, Whitney.
Whitney: Yeah. I think everything that I've been through has led me to this point. I'm thankful for all of it from childhood to now. Every trauma, every experience, every depression, all of that has helped me to get to the point to be able to create beautiful music and to serve.
[00:54:38] What Would You Talk About With A Younger Version Of Yourself?
Valerie: And if you could go back in time and talk to a younger version of yourself, how old would you be, first of all, and what would you talk about with her?
Whitney: I think I would be about seven. And I would say Whitney, pick fear out of your face and be proud of who you are cuz you are unique and there's no one like you and you have something to offer this world that only you can give.
Valerie: Nice. And how do you think that would help your seven year old self? What was she afraid of?
Whitney: I think I would've started singing earlier.
Valerie: Mm. You would've come out from behind that piano a little earlier?
Yes. Yeah, that makes sense.
Thank you. I appreciate you being open and honest about all the things that have happened to you in your life and sharing your stories with, others who, you know, need to hear those stories.
Whitney: Yeah.
Valerie: And to keep singing through it all.
Whitney: I've learned that the music, it's for healing me as well.
Valerie: Thanks for listening to this episode of Living A Vocal Life. And remember if you have any burning questions or comments feel free to connect with me via Podcast Inbox. Simply visit the Ask Me Anything section at podcastinbox.com/livingavocallife. You can also find the link in today's show notes.
Additionally, in today's show notes you'll find a link to this episode on my website. There you can learn more about Whitney, listen to her music, and connect with her through her website or social media. All of these links are also available in the show notes on whatever podcast app you're listening in. Until next time, be well and keep on singing.
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